It takes 4 cups of coffee to get thru a working day...

Man.. I seriously can't stand driving in the morning sometimes.. it's really tiring when you have to drive 1 hour plus to work when u had only like 5 hours of sleep.. u feel like you're half dead and u're like a zombie.. Today.. I was really dozing off while driving... I really can't keep my eyes open.. I just felt like sleeping and let my car drive itself.. gosh.. they should have some auto driver shit jus like auto-pilotting on the plane...

I guess the smart tunnel is fucking dumb after all.. it's supposed to be a tunnel where there will be no flash floods on the highway.. but guess wat.. this dumb tunnel has been flooded over and over again.. to the extent they have to close it several times to maintain it.. it's causing traffic congestion to everyone working at KL... Flyfm's ben was damn sarcastic today.. he sorta describe the smart tunnel as a big longkang in KL... a place where all the water will go to! haha.. I guess.. Samy boy is lucky as he is no longer the works minister... but I pity his successor...

The first thing I did when I arrive at my client's place was to go to the nearest coffee shop to have a cup of kopi-0.. I had a cup an hour ago at home.... and guess what.. by 11.00 something... I was zoning off at my client's place.. it's just so damn dry and boring.. it makes me wanna sleep.. I really hate doing uninteresting shit... I wish the whole audit was full of issues.. but yet again.. that would mean my workload would increase by far..

Lunch time.. there goes.. another cup of kopi-0.. barely 15 minutes setting my ass on the chair after lunch.. I dozed off again.. I gave up.. I went down to the sundry shop and got 3 cans of kopi-o.. but I only had one lerr.. It's a total of 4 cups at the end of the day! It's like a routine to me already.. to have 4 cups of coffee (minimum)..... if not I really can't see myself getting thru the day.. I guess the 4-5 hours of sleep everyday has been catching up wif me... I get really grumpy sometimes and I just feel like doing nothing........

Imagine I'm only having a normal work day of 8 hours.. I can't see myself working for more hours than that..I'll probably need 7 cups of coffee at least... and you know what.. each time I dun have coffee.. I'll start to have a runny nose... gosh.. I think it's like drugs to me now.. I'm screwed...! I should start looking for caffeine pills.. faster way of feeling awake!

Guess that's just working life.. a fucking pain in the ass

U know it's gonna be a bad day when...

1. Your favourtie football team got beaten badly last night by their arch rivals...
2. Man Utd seems to be having a clear run at the top of the Premiership....
3. You have a tummy ache from yesterday's rojak...
4. You realize you are not yet a CPA member...
5. You realize you can't register for the mentor programme and risk having to work an extra half
a year at EY...
6. You realize the cut-off for CPA registration is Feb 29th....
7. Your claims for expenses are missing...
8. You just can't seem to get anything done in the morning...
9. Your kopi-O and newspaper you want is sold out at 7-11...
10.You don't get to meet the person you want to meet...
11.You don't get to hear the song you want to on the radio...
12.You can't seem to do anything right at work...
13.You thought you lose your senior's thumbdrive...
14.You're caught in a heavy jam and all you want to do is go home and lie down..
15.You think you have a traffic summon coming your way...
16.Your thoughts are everywhere...

I really want to listen to 'Bad day' by Daniel Powter right now.. !

Some games are just not for people with faint of heart..

Something struck me today.. I shall not play a game which I'm not up for it. It's just like drinking.. u have to know your limits.. and never go beyond it.. if not you'll suffer the consequences of a hangover and vomitting..

Things I don't understand...

I don't understand why.. your manager has to give u work at 5 p.m when u were sitting down doing nothing from 8.30 a.m till 10.00 a.m. It annoys the shit out of me when ur mgr/senior or ur fellow colleague gives u work at 5 p.m. It's like.. wtf.. I've been sitting down doing nothing for half the day.. now u give me shit to work on at 5 p.m just went I'm about to leave.. I really don't get it.. why not they just give you a schedule and let u know what u have to work on for the day, so that people who come early can start work early and go home early.. those fuckers who come late can stay till late.. it's all about being efficient and flexible with schedule and time planning...

Another thing is when you have to clean up other's mess.. I was given a set of audit working papers.. and I was ordered to fill in a form which shows what work has been done on it.. gosh.. I looked at it.. and I started swearing in office.. wtf...? how can u tell what that person has done..? I swear.. it is impossible to know what work has been done in a particular area you did it by urself.. I've been cleaning up other ppl's shit for this past one month.. some shit that I don't even understand.. I just simply do some shit.. and make it a bigger pile of shit.. sometimes, I really doubt the effectiveness of an audit...

Thirdly, Malaysians have spoken and know that they want a change.. but have those who always asked for a change really know what they want..? Do you want equality, less corruption... or u just don't give a damn... whatever change is good..? Things going on in the transition period for the state governments aren't going smoothly.. well, for me, it doesn't matter who becomes the Menteri Besar as long as I get to eat my bak kut teh.. and I get to eat my roast pork.. Well, I doubt that there will be bak kut teh in Kedah and Perak, haha.. I think the whole problem lies in the state and federal constitution.. everything is set based on the importance of one race..

Before the elections my dad asked me, do you think there'll be a difference..? I said yeah.. but now.. I'm starting to feel that I might have to eat my words.. He gave me the analogy of a major shareholder vs the minority.. seriously.. who gives a fuck bout the minority shareholder..? If you don't like the company policy, sell your shares and fuck off.. who cares bout the interest of a minority shareholder? It's the major shareholder that counts as he has the most stakes.. well.. take that analogy and apply it to the current situation in Malaysia...

The thing is.. the minorities are so used to being surpressed that they can't speak up for equality anymore... they want a change... but I guess.. it is almost impossible to get equality here..

Proudest moment as a Malaysian for everyone..

Finally.. Malaysians has spoken up.. after 50 years of supression and marginalisation by the coalition government.. we Malaysians finally fought back and speak up what's on our minds.. We let them know that we are no longer conservative people who are afraid to let things change.. we are all educated people and we are always willing to change things when things are not going on the right track for the country..

Forget bout those olden era where the whole lot of voters are usually staunch supporters of one party and would always forgive the party whenever they screw up... People of the new era are less forgiving and we are exposed to what's happening outside Malaysia. Voters can always use the internet the most advanced media to reach information sources that we could never access before this to give us clarification on what really is going on in the government and the dirty tricks, corruption and manipulation carried out by certain individuals or parties... Gone are those days..

Today.. Malaysians finally make full use of their democracy rights.. they finally realize the need to be recognised as a Malaysian and not according to our racial roots... I agree.. the whole problem of racial equality has not been solved and it would be difficult to do so.. but at least.. we are on the right track... regardless of which party contests on the next election.. they know that the people do not buy their racial strategies anymore.. we don't buy their ideology of only helping a certain race.. what we want is an equal opportunity for all of us.. to bring this nation to a whole new level and to have everyone in this country to be united as one..

Besides that, the upset caused by the opposition was not a tsunami.. neither it was something that should catch us by surprise.. all the signs have shown towards an upset.. all the signs were pointing towards a change.. and finally.. people exercise their rights for a change.. this is not only a success for the opposition party.. but a success for us as Malaysians.. we finally get a more balanced government, a government with more people's voice.. I believe everyone should be given a fair chance to speak up their mind.. given a fair chance to give constructive comments and everyone should be given a share of the country's development..

Before 8th of March, I knew there were doubters, doubters that doubt that there will be a change, I myself was quite skeptical too.. I thought that things will always stay the same and never change.. but I guess I was wrong.. Malaysians have improved and I'm proud of it.. This is one of the proudest moment of my life as a Malaysian.. I guess my decision to come back has not totally been wrong.. it's starting to show good signs.. it's starting to show that Malaysians to have a democratic system despite manipulation by certain parties and individuals.. We managed to sweep out ministers who don't perform.. our birthday boy today.. finally realized.. he's not unbeatable after all... he's not God.. he is only human.. and he has to face the consequences of his failure of fighting for the rights of his community and only fighting for his individual benefit...

I guess.. this is a really good beginning.. a new era.. new hope for us as Malaysians..

Every man's nightmare... HAIR LOSS!!!

As usual I went for my monthly haircut today.. and all I thought of was to jus haf a haircut ler... Well.. the hairdresser did her usual thing and all.. but as she went on.. she told me that I my scalp was sensitive and..... I was suffering from HAIR LOSS.. wtf.. I mean.. I know I don't have much hair.. and some more she tell me hair loss in the middle part..... u say... HAI LATZZZ or not..? aihhhsss.. i got my pay check yesterday.. gave nearly half of it to my mom.. another RM140 burnt off for hair products today.. wtf man.. wat am I gonna eat for the rest of the month...? Sigh.....

Anyways.. things has been going on smoothly this few weeks.. too smooth to the extent I'm actually afraid of whether I'll be able to adapt to a tensed working environment! Well.. I'm not complaining ler.. it's borin shit and all.. but I kinda adapted to it already.. Btw.. today I only worked for 3 hours.. syok rite..? another 5-6 hours was spent on doing rubbish....!

On another note.. election is coming and the election fever really is ons here.. unlike the elections in Australia.. the election here involves a lot of flyers and posters everywhere.. come to think of it.. we're not really helping the environment.. all these bloody politicians.. during normal days never see them.. during elections.. can see them at every corner of Malaysia.. messed up man.. I really hope those who can vote already to vote wisely.. our country is not as well as it seems..... 7.3 % of GDP growh.. who the fuck came out with these figures man..? I guess they just shit out the figures to deceive some dumb ppl.. ppl fail to realize that prices of essential items have gone way high but our pay hasn't gone up at all...

Another cancer patient that I know of.. has lost the battle.. seriously, sometimes life is just unfair.. her daughter in law is about to deliver in april.. one more month to go.. and she had to go.. life is just fated sometimes..

That's all for now.. hope everyone's doing well......!

Boring weekend...

Looks like.. my life pretty much revolves around these few things... work, sleep, eat, mahjong and mamak.. This weekend.. mahjong was taken off from my list of things to do.. so.. I'm left with work, sleep and eat... freaking sien man.. Well, maybe its time to get some rest also ler.. I've been sleeping for 6 hours or 5 hours plus for the past one month or so... I hardly get 8 hour sleeps anymore.. I can't imagine ppl like Damien, Sheanee or Joanna working next time.. They'll probably sleep in the office or something like that...

Someone told me the other day.. u dun look like u're from klang.. U dun haf the klang 'look'.. In my heart I was like wtf... wat u expect me to haf..? Red, yellow and green hair.. scream into your ears while talking to u... and pushing u around while talking to u and so on..? Gosh.. I think klangnites are misunderstood sometimes.. Just because there are gangsters in klang and a lot of ah bengs in Klang doesn't mean everyone's like that.. I think Klang ppl are actually nice ppl and fucking hell.. at least we get our fireworks.. unlike losers in the city and near the city who don't haf such luxury.. Yeah.. we might not be as cool as others.. but we're down to earth ppl..... ok ok.... enuf said..! I don't wanna offend too many ppl..

I haf had to haf lunch alone a couple of times last week.. see.. being able to haf lunch alone is not too bad after all.. It gets a bit boring.. thts when ur ipod comes in handy.. or maybe ur mobile phone.. I get so bored at work sometimes.. that I need to go thru my list of contacts.. n to msg ppl that I think will entertain me.. Haha.. explains how boring my job is... it's freaking tedious! A couple of my friends had to work late the last week.. one till 7 in the morning.. wth.. no need sleep meh..? like that torture ppl......

Well... I'm so not looking forward to tomorrow and the week ahead.. I need some excitement in my life man.. If I continue leaving such a life.. sooner or later.. I'll be a dull old fart...

Finally... the real shit...

Well.. looks like the next two weeks is gonna be hell for me... I have to compile 3 audit working papers for 3 subsidiaries.. of some stupid company which means.. I have 3 working days for each working paper.. imagine.. a newbie like me who has no idea wat some of the basic jargons and who has forgotten wat I learnt in university given such a big task.. I really can't imagine... if I can't pull this off.. I really duno wat to do.. it's not like university, where if u can't hand in ur assignment u just get marks deducted... so to those of u still at uni.. damn it.. stick to ur dateline...

I come to work everyday.. asking myself whether this job is suitable for me or not.. it really is some boring shit.. and at the moment I can't see myself staying for 3 years.. I don't understand what I'm doing.. everyone is moving like a F1 car.. it could be hard to catch someone to ask them.. how to do things.. everyone here somehow looks a bit robotic to me and all they do is work.. it scares u sometimes when u see the amount of ppl back at the office even at 11 p.m. Gosh.. at moments like this.. I wished I was at uni where I have my fellow classmates stressing out with me and doing the same shit with me.. and we could still collaborate.. over here.. u do ur own shit... others do theirs...

I just can't find the passion to work.. I can't find something that I like.. it's really difficult for me.. it's like a Man Utd fan being forced to play for Liverpool or Arsenal.. u just can't be bothered and u're just willing to sit there without ever playing..

Seriously...... what should I do.......?

Anyways.. to all of u melbournians having exams.. all the best..!

Valentine's Day....

Well, it looks like tomorrow is Valentine's day, YET again... the day to look forward to for couples (actually for guys.. maybe it's not such a good thing, but hey, u dunno wats in store for you at the end of the day *wink*, haha). For those who are still single (like me), it's a day to avoid shopping centers,cinemas and love spots... or rather.. making love spots.. HAHA

Anyways, this year's Valentine's would be different... not that I've found a date.. ok.. maybe I've found a date.. with my JOB... rather than previous years where my single friends would play mahjong.. and sigh throughout the game.. or looking through our phonebook.. wondering which girl would be available for a date.. or even daydreaming that one day we'll find the ONE...

Oh well... maybe it's not too bad after all.. I still get to keep my own cash and splurge on things that I like.. rather than burning a hole in my pocket getting flowers and gifts that are overpriced around this time of the year (a way to comfort myself, give me some pride please....) So, it's actually not too bad in a way....

Yeap.. to those of you celebrating this day.. treasure ur loved ones.. and appreciate them.. hope you guys would start a new 'life' in 9 months time (hint: CC)... hehe.. jk...

Post from office (Gong Xi Fa Cai)

Well, it's been about 2 weeks that I've started working... Well, what can I say (sounds like Shebby Singh)? Earning money is harder than spending money, duh.. so those ppl back in melbourne who are still spending their parents' money, continue doing so till a stage that you are fully satisfied.. then only start working...

I reached office at 7.30 a.m this morning just to beat the jam.. and so that I can blog for all of u... hehe.. see.. I so nice right? Anyways... orientation is going on for this two days.. gosh.. after this would be hell for me.. I'm gonna start work again on wednesday... and this time is the real assignment.. not like the last one.. where I just help out my fellow colleague!

Well.. after my lessons from my first week of work, I no longer wear G2000 when I go back to main office.. I wear something that is not that common, for example.. the Ben Shermen shirt that I got from Melboune.. On another note... I've been eating like... 5 - 6 meals a day during CNY.. so it's back to dieting YET again (that's what I say all the time)..

Btw.. I would like to wish everyone a happy chinese new year, hope you guys are making loads of money and sharing them with me.. to you melbournians.. happy seeing each other everyday till march! Hehe..

Lessons in working life...

Well..... I'm officially no longer unemployed.. I am currently working at Ernst and Young Malaysia... 2nd day of work.. and I am already thrown on the frontline with my colleague, she has one and a half year's experience... but the project was supposedly to be completed by a senior and an associate one.. not a newbee like me... gosh.. I really do not know shit...

2ndly... to much of u and my disappointment as well, the hot chick that i mentioned already has a bf .. so it's no longer an issue.. guess we should only talk bout work from now on.. no more other rubbish... hahahahhaha... guess somethings are just not meant to be...

3rdly... Never wear G2000 clothes to ur main office.. I wore a stripe shirt for orientation and guess what.. 2 other guys wore the same thing.. they must have thought we were gay couples or some shit like that.. gosh.. G2000 sucks man! SO embarassing!

Fourthly, sacrifice 15 minutes of ur sleep to get to work early! I realize if i leave my house earlier , I can avoid half an hour's worth of jam.. so.. conclusion is wake up at 6.00... and go to work at 6.45.. to u fellow melbournians who are still not working.. enjoy ur student life.. and don't even think about working! working is not that great.. its so routine....

Fifth, never have too much food for lunch.. for the past 3 days.. I had heavy lunch and everytime I come back from lunch.. I just want to go to sleep.. I find myself so unproductive after lunch.. I just feel like going home after lunch!

Sixth, try to leave ur office early!!!!! If u leave late........ U'RE DOOMED.. enjoy a 2-hour ride home...

That's it.. don't ask me bout lunch anymore!

As I bid my farewell...

For the past 1 year, staring blankly at the the view outside the balcony of the verve apartments has been one of my favourite pastime. It's really calm and soothing after a long day or a great moment of peace before starting the day. Guess this might be the last time, I ever look out those glass doors again.

It's not easy when you realize that you are gonna leave some place you have been for the past three years. Melbourne is not perfect, but I guess it is really a nice place to stay in especially for those who migrate. It's not as quiet as before, but I guess what makes my stay here fun is that I get the freedom I don't get at home like what most of my friends would stay. It is almost impossible for me to get out of my house at wee hours of like 1 a.m or 2 a.m in the morning. Where else, I could do it here...

The past few days was fun-filled with the two new friends I made from Jeannie's graduation, going to the casino, having coffee, going to the beach and just talking rubbish all the time. It makes it even harder to want to just leave without a heavy heart. It just makes me feel like staying here for a bit more longer or at least till new year's over! I want to see the fireworks here as I have never celebrated new years here... man.. what a day to leave.. on new year's eve when all the celebrations are going on! I'll have to celebrate on the plane... I'm not even sure I'm ready to start work, but I know I've gotta do so.. I can't rely on my parents anymore... I need to change (I've said this a million times), I realize I am not really a very responsible person...

Oh well.. what's gotta come has to come... I know it's time for me to go home.. I know I'll be back here some day.. I don't know when.. but I know Melbourne has became my second home.. and if I ever want to move.. Melbourne's the place... I feel like I haven't seen enough of Melbourne... I've not gone to enough places.. Maybe I'm a home person and hardly go around.. even in Melbourne.. I rather spend my weekends lazying off the couch.. or bed... haha.. now I'm regretting..! Gosh...

Anyways, I want to thank of all you Melbournians.. for my great experience here for the past 3 years.. sure it hasn't been all high... but I do treasure the times I've spent with each and everyone of you.. It's been nice knowing all of you.. it's been nice doing random shits together with you guys.. I'm really sorry if I ever did anything or say anything to harm anyone.. (I probably didn't mean it).

Take care everyone and have a great year ahead of you guys! I shall see you guys soon... Ciao!

The future looks bleak for my home...

It's sad to say.. recent events really has put me to dwell with my decision of going back home. It keeps me thinking whether I have a future back home, whether it is even safe for me to return home. If I had a choice, I would love to bring my family here, but I know that's nearly impossible my parents have lived their life there for the past 60 over years. How do you expect someone to change their style of living after 60 years? Not to mention, they would have tremendous trouble communicating with the people here....

Everytime I look at the local newspapers.. it saddens me.. it keeps me thinking.. it's been a long time.. we have given 'them' enough time and opportunities to catch up with 'us'. It's just that they are slow in a very 'special' way. Why the differences? Why the different treatment? Why the lack of transparency? Why the lack of freedom? Why sending away all your talented people to somewhere else? Who is it to be blamed? The way we are going, we will never achieve what we are supposed to achieve in another 12 years time.. DEVELOPED BY THAT TIME? You must be joking.... The way we do stuffs is no different from our 'neighbours'... such autocracy imposed.. WHAT DEMOCRACY IS THERE?

Deep in my heart right now, I know I'll be back in here some day.. not so soon.. but some day I'll return.. when there is nothing more left back home.. nothing to be proud of.. nothing that will keep me there anymore.. and nothing for me to savour anymore... I can't just think of the present.. I need to think of the future.. I need to think of the future generations.. I want to make a difference back home.. but who am I and what are my abilities to make a change?

It's time to wake up..

Finally.. I've graduated.. that has been my goal, my dream and my wish for these three years. I finally have joined in the 'elite' group of graduates, well at least that was what I thought. After graduating, I thought, I would be able to do whatever I want from there, boy was I wrong. Being a graduate nowadays doesn't mean much nowadays, graduates are everywhere, it's just like pasar malam goods which are available at anytime any day and being a graduate means that you've only completed a small portion of what you're suppose to achieve in life.

After my exams, I sat down and thought, am I capable enough to compete in such a competitve environment in the future? Do I have enough knowledge, language skills and communication skills to do so? I really doubt it.. I have a lot of plans in my mind.. but I just can't execute it, I want to improve my English, I want to improve my Mandarin, I want to be in real good shape and I want to have a good job, but I just don't know how.

All this while, I've relied on others to help me, provide me with guidance, I guess it's about time, I wake up from my dreams and start rely on myself and measure how far I've improved in these three years time. I can't believe it.. I still have to rely on my sister and kee win to help me with my job application.. I was thinking.. where will I end up if no one ever helped me? Am I really that useless? Am I really not capable at all? I look back at my life.. and realize.. all this while I've never taken the initiative to improve myself.. I've never bothered to read books, read journals, magazines or anything at all.. all I ever did was.. see what is in front of me.. and never looked beyond it... I relied on others to plan for me.. I relied on others to guide me..

When will I grow? Please let me know...

Patience...

I feel like I'm running out of patience already.. it feels forever before my first paper starts.. it feels like that time is stalled.. ppl are moving way ahead of me.. I'm still stuck at my count of zero exams.. I agree you have more time to study.. but I'm so afraid that I would forget what I study before my exams start...

Oh well.. I shall not complain so much.. I really feel so thankful for being able to sleep peacefully for the past one week.. I hope it will continue to be like this.. no more watching soccer games in the middle of the morning for me! That really screwed up my whole routine.. I'm starting to get use to coming to the library everyday now.. it doesn't feel that bad actually.. at least when I get home.. I know I'm done for the day.. and I can just relax...

I really can't be bothered about grades.. H1.. H2A.. I told myself.. I'm just gonna attempt to do my best.. I won't set targest for myself.. I'm gonna achieve what I can.. it doesn't matter what is the outcome.. as long as I know.. I didn't just waste my time and do nothing.. my method of studying might be wrong.. but hey.. at least I put effort into it.. I could answer daringly to anyone that I actually put effort into this exam.. I have no regrets...

Almost there... almost there...

Finally.. some good news came in today.. I woke up this morning full of energy... don't know why... I knew it was gonna be a good day.. the sun was bright in the morning.. I switched on the tv..! Liverpool v Besiktas.. I quickly showered and watched the second half.. Boy oh Boy.. if only we play like that week in week out.. we would whoop anyone's ass... even Brazil or Italy or anyone at all.. I reckon.. the width was there.. everything was there.. I really wonder how we lost to Besiktas away...? It's just not possible!!!!!!!

Anyways.. the good news does not stop there.. ! I went to 7-11.. I didn't see anyone there at first.. I thought the free slurpee thing was just some hoax to make me embarass myself to ask for a free slurpee..!! Well, I eventually made myself brave and went in and ask for a free slurpee... the cashier was quiet.. as though he didn't want to give it to me.. but he told me to get a small slurpee in the end..

And then... the dreaded hour.. 1.00 p.m.. finally arrived.. the time that will decide whether I passed my strategic marketing before I sit for the exams.. well.. I didn't pass.. BUT....... I was only 0.5 marks away from passing now..! means.. if they round it up.. I'll PASS!!!!! YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is definitely the best piece of news for this whole week! I've never been able to know my fate before my exams.... well.. this is the one and only one and this is good.. Gosh.. thank god.. it was actually a blessing in disguise.. I would have to thank the tutor and lecturer as well! ahhaha...

Anyways.. back to studies.. can't procrastinate... good luck to everyone having exams... especially those having audit this Friday.. almost there.. almost there...... a bit more...... then everything will be done!!!!! YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!!!!!!!

How bad can your Mondays get..?

Spending your whole Monday in the library.. is one of the worst things to do.. btw.. this comic strip was published on my birthday in the year of 1986! Gosh..... I seriously can't wait anymore.. I need to finish exams..! I need to..

Mika - Happy ending...

Wake up in the morning,
Stumble on my life.
Can't get no love without sacrifice.
If anything should happen,
I guess I wish you well.
Mm A little bit of heaven,
With a little bit of hell.

This is the hardest story that I've ever told. (ooooo)
No hope, no love, no glory.
A happy ending gone forever more.
I feel as if I'm wasted,
And I'm wasted everyday.

This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

Two o'clock in the morning,
Something's on my mind.
Can't get no rest,
Keep walking around.
If I pretend that nothing ever went wrong
I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on.

This is the hardest story that I've ever told. (ooooo)
No hope, no love, no glory.
A happy ending gone forever more.
I fell as if I'm wasted,
And I'm wasted everyday.


This is the way you left me, (Oh I fell as if I'm wasted)
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love, (And I'm wasted everyday)
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

I won't backdown..

The feared time of the year is around the corner again.. EXAMS... somehow or rather sleep is difficult for me during this period of time.. I have trouble gaining good sleep during this time.. I can go to bed at 11 or 12 and end up really falling asleep at about 4-6. I know its weird... But tracking back, I realized my sleeping disorder didn't just suddenly come..

I remember when I was back in Form 5, sometimes I would have trouble sleeping till four or five in the morning while preparing for exams.. I usually drink a large thermos of coffee and can drink up to 6 cups of coffee in a day.. explains why I can't sleep and that I'm a cafeine addict or you can say that I'm abusing cafeine...

Well this time around is no exception.. for the past few days I've had lots of difficulty getting good sleep.. but this time around.. there's no giving up.. I'm gonna do what it takes to finish off this race.. even if it takes me to do things that I refuse to do.. Nothing's gonna stop me from finishing this...

Special thanks to everyone!
Just would like to thank everyone again.. for coming, helping me clean, cook, preparing....!