What hurts the most..

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house, that don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry
Every once in a while even though goin on with you gone still upsets me
There are days
Every now and again i pretend i'm okay but that's not what gets me
What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere i go
But i'm doin it
It's hard to force that smile when i see our old friends and i'm alone
Still harder gettin up, gettin dressed, livin with this regret
But i know if i could do it over
I would trade, give away all the words that i saved in my heart that i left unspoken
What hurts the most, is being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do
What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
And never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do
not seein that lovin you
that’s what I was tryin to do…

A late night post...

It's 2a.m in the morning.. today is the first time I find it so hard to fall asleep since I've started working for the past 1 year and 3 months.. I usually have no issues sleeping due to my long hours at work... but today is the first time in a really really long time I find it hard to sleep.. is it because I just had like 5 cigarettes a while ago..? I really don't know...

Tonight... there seems to be a lot on my mind... some uneasiness easing into me.. slipping through right to me from toe to top... I seem to be so restless.. so much to say.. so much to tell.. but just can't open up.. I hate this feeling.. I really hate it.. is it because I've lost it...? I've lost touch..? I've lost what it becomes to be my true self? Is it because I'm just a coward hiding underneath my shell.. waiting for things to happen.. waiting for lady luck or santa to say.. hey.. you've been nice.. now here's what you wanted...

I feel so helpless.. so helpless to the fact.. that I will go hide myself in the closet and hide there.. It's not the first time.. and I bet it won't be the last.. Sometimes I wish things would be easier.. things would be more straight forward.. things would always be my way.. but yeah.. I have learnt the hard way.. things do not always happen as you want it.. I want to be different.. I want to emulate others.. I envy what they have.. There's just something missing from me..

The thing with me is... I've never dared to try making changes.. I always take one step forward but the next thing I know I take several steps back.. I am risk averse.. I am afraid of failure.. I am afraid that I'm being battered to the extent that I can't stand up again.. I'm afraid to lose.. I'm afraid to lose what I've built for so long.. and lose it overnight.. I'm afraid of how ppl will look at me..

It's just 2 a.m.. forgive me for babbling..

Because it's a winding road... ( A very random post)

Sometimes you just realize that no matter how hard you've tried and how hard you've strived.. certain things just seems to remain stagnant... The economy is down.. people are out of job... those who are working have to work extra hours for free.. it just seems like everything is haywire... and regardless how hard you've tried or strived... this bad situations seems to get the better of you...

Day in and day out we think bout work.. work and workk.. the newspapers complain about job cuts, pay cuts... interest rate cuts... but nvr say anything bout tax cuts... haha.. I guess that's just the way it is at the moment.. There's no easy life in this world.. unless u're born rich.. even so.. u need to manage ur wealth so that u don't become poor one day... but hey... when u're rich things just seems easier... but those who are really successful are those who work their way up from scratch...

What else can we achieve in life..? I ask myself this.. I find so many answers.. the grass always looks greener on the other side... I want to be a financial consultant, I want to be an event manager.. I want to be an astronaut... I want to be a footballer... I want anything else other than my current job...! Haha.. but at the end of the day.. we're still stuck here.. still doing what we're doing... Many of us want changes but are afraid to make changes at the same time...

Miracles...? What miracles..? You think fairytales like slum dog millionaire happen everyday..? You must be kidding me... Yeah.. the story is a miracle itself... but for that movie to wipe out 8 awards from the Oscars.. that's just amazing.. No doubt it's a good movie.. with very good storylines.. but I guess Hollywood must be bored of all these super hero blockbusters.... well miracles... they just don't happen everyday......!

At the end of the day, life is a winding road.... and we all strive to overcome all the corners and all the obstacles...

Women's English..

"Yes" = No
"No" = Yes
"Maybe" = No
"I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry
"We need" = I want
"It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now
"Sure... go ahead" = I don't want you to
"I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
"We need to talk" = I need to complain
"You're certainly attentive tonight" = Is sex all you ever think about?
"Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs
"This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house
"I want new curtains" = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...
"I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep
"Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive
"How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're really not going to like
"I'll be ready in a minute" = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.
"Is my butt fat?" = Lie to me
"You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me
"Are you listening to me!?" = [Too late, you're dead]
"Do what you want." = You'll pay for this later

I want to start clean...

Well.. the first deadline has passed by to change things... New Year's 2009... now there's a second deadline.. Chinese New Year.. well I have failed to set things right come 1 January 2009.. now here's a second chance.. second chance saloon to get things right... my aim to start everything with a bang.. in terms of career and everything else...

I have a point to prove.. a big point this year.. this is a make or break year in terms of my career as an auditor.. rumuors are if everything goes well.. the next promotion for my batch would be in June.. I definitely would not want to miss that promotion.. I know I have a short 4 months to prove myself to my seniors and managers.. that I'm capable of doing what it takes to be there.. I need to prove to my doubters (I am the biggest doubter of myself.. haha) that I can do it.. I am not what I appear to be.. I am more than that.. way more than that..
Mental strength and self confidence is my biggest weakness.. I really have to admit I have poor mental strength.. I tend to lose my direction when I'm under stress.. I lose direction.. when I hit a wall.. not knowing how to turn left or right... I lose direction when I'm thrown on a solo challenge... To overcome everything else.. I need to first overcome myself.... I am the biggest enemy of myself...

Next thing.. I need to stop taking those convenience provided by my family.. For the past 20 over odd years, my family has been extremely protective over me.. especially my dad.. I need to stop taking things for granted and start realizing that I am 23 this year.. I am old enough to take care of myself and I do not need anyone to back me up in life.. yeah.. I may need assistance.. but not each and everyday of my life...

Target.. My target is to endure.. this is the biggest test so far in my life.. having to deal with reality.. with the most common sight of human.. where there is minimal forgiveness for your mistakes or your clumsiness.. The phrase "I'm sorry, I think I made a mistake" is no longer acceptable... or "I'm sorry.. I think I'm still a newbie" .. that is no longer acceptable as well...

I want to start clean.. quit all my bad habits.. pick up new things.. I am in a learning process.. I need to improve.. I need to move forward.. I have to show what I am capable of.. I will and I swear I will not give up till the battle is done..

Too many times

Too many times...

I have failed to hang on to my resolutions...
I have failed to change for the better...
I have failed to see the bigger picture...
I have failed to be ambitious...
I have made the same mistakes...
I have failed to leave up to expectations...
I have walked down the same path..
I have stayed in my comfort zone......
I have failed to show determination...
I have complained about my surroundings...
I have failed to see that the problem lies in me...
I have reasons for my failures...
I have over-estimated my ability...
I lose confidence when I face obstacles...

It's just too many times I failed to be the better man.. time to buck up and move forward..

The ups, downs & miracles of 2008

It's yet another year, another new environment, new friends and new challenges. This is usually the time of the year where u really look into what you have set for yourself beginning of the year and what you actually achieved by now. Well, honestly, my major target for myself this year was to kickstart my career not sure of whether I'm actually up for it. I remember my flight landed in Malaysia at 6.00 a.m in the morning of 1st January 2008. As I left the airport, I told myself I'm gonna start this year with a bang and accomplish something.

Eventually, I managed to get myself a job in Ernst & Young as an auditor knowing the obstacles and challenges that I would face. It really was an experience. First few months were really the honeymoon months, meeting new people, acclimatise myself with the working environment. Going through the off-peak period was like a miracle as you never thought that an auditor's job could be so easy and flexible. I took my first 2 papers for CPA soon and I think I got a fair result for it. Soon after exams, things were really hell, being thrown at challenges after challenges, working through 10 hour working days or even more. Being promoted after 7 months of your job is not a good thing, you lack the experience, you lack the knowledge, what more I'm a person who lacks the motivation when it comes to things that doesn't interest me.

If you were to ask me, what was the biggest gain I had this year? I would have to say.. a bunch of colleagues who eventually turn out to be my close friends ( thiam yong, wen hsin, chee kang, christina, ai peng, dawson, tinesh, wan chin, wei zhen, hong seng, yuet lin, choon hoong, the list just goes on and on.... sorry if I left out anyone). A bunch of people who walked with me, encouraged me and even shared my complains with me. No doubt without them, I would never have reached this far working as an auditor. But the question remains: how long more could I battle on? It's not an easy task having to put in 10 hours day in day out in a job for the peak period and facing things that are foreign and uninteresting. I ask myself everyday in the morning: What is it that I like bout this job? The only answer was my friends. I really hope I could go through these three years together with all of them.

Not to mention my close friends, kok fai n chia ming who heard a big share of my complains in both my career and guy girl problems. I guess this people have come a long way with me. I felt that I might have neglected some of my other friends and my family along the way due to tight schedules as an auditor. Well, I still managed to keep in touch with Jeannie, one of the few people who came back from Aussie. Melbourne was indeed a place I really miss, some of the people there like CC, Su San,Damien, Daniel, Ken, Kee Win, Kai, Joanna, 24, Sheanee... gosh it seems like its been a really long time since we met. I really hope I could balance out my time next year and meet as many people as possible including all my other friends from Klang.

Well, I guess that kinda sums up my year, it's been a struggle, but yet it was filled with joy and new experiences. This is my first post in a million years I know, but I really hope I would find the motivation to continue writing....... hehe..

Bent..

If I fall along the way
Pick me up and dust me off
If I get too tired to make it
Be my breath so I can walk
If I need some of your love again
Give me more than I can stand
When my smile gets old and faded
Wait around I'll smile again
Shouldn't be so complicated
Just hold me and then
Just hold me again
Chorus:Can you help me I'm bent
I'm so scared that I'll never
Get put back together
Keep breaking me in
And this is how we will live
With you and me bent
If I couldn't sleep could you sleep
Could you paint me better off
Could you sympathize with my needs
I know you think I need a lot
I started out clean but I'm jaded
Just falling
Just breaking the skin
Chorus: Start bending me
It's never enough
'Til I feel all your pieces
Start bending me
Keep bending me until I'm completely broken in
Shouldn't be so complicated
Just touch me and then
Just touch me again
Chorus: Without understandingHell, I'll go there again
Can you help me I'm bent
I'm so scared that I'll never
Get put back together
Yeah, you're breaking me in
And this is how we will live

Mungkin nanti - Peterpan

Sahaja ku berkata mungkin yang terakhir kalinya
Sudahlah lepaskan semua kuyakin inilah waktunya
Mungkin saja kau bukan yang dulu lagi
Mungkin saja rasa itu telah pergi
Dan mungkin bila nanti kita kan bertemu lagi
Satu pintaku jangan kau coba tanyakan kembali
Rasa yang ku tinggal mati
Seperti hari kemarin saat semua di sini
Dan bila hatimu termenung bangun dari mimpi-mimpimu[Mmm]
Membuka hatimu yang dulu cerita saat bersamaku
Mungkin saja kau bukan yang dulu lagi
Mungkin saja rasa itu telah pergi
Dan mungkin bila nanti kita kan bertemu lagi
Satu pintaku jangan kau coba tanyakan kembali
Rasa yang kutinggal mati
Seperti hari kemarin saat semua di sini
Dan mungkin bila nanti kita kan bertemu lagi
Satu pintaku jangan kau coba tanyakan kembali
Rasa yang kutinggal mati
Seperti hari kemarin saat semua di sini
Tak usah kau tanyakan lagi simpan untukmu sendiri
Semua sesal yang kau cari semua rasa yang kau beri

Nice malay ballad... go download it

how time flies...

Without even realizing it.. my blog turned 2 years on April 13.. Gosh.. it's been 2 years since i started blogging.. and I don't think I have done a great job on this site.. I remember making a resolution of emulating famous bloggers like kenny sia, jeff ooi and kinkybluefairy in one of my new year resolutions.. but i think.. what I've achieved so far.. is far cry from what they've achieved...

I guess.. I use my blog for different reasons.. to vent my anger and mainly to vent out things I've failed to say verbally sometimes.. It helps in a way, but the fact that you'll never know who reads your blog makes u worry about the content sometimes... You have to worry bout the things u can write and things u can't write... and if you put a password to ur post.. then what is the point of having a blog then..? I believe though many people who read this blog are those who really know me.. and interested in knowing what's going on in my life... and to some.. it's just to kill time when they're bored... haha...

Either or.. I hope I have not bore you guys with lame things that's been going on and on in my life.. to tell the truth, I find my life rather monotonous and lack of hoo-ha.. to entertain u guys.. In other words, I'm just a common person.. and not a person living in a fantasy world or living in the lifestyle of the rich n famous.. Therefore, forgive me, if my posts lack the spice or interesting bits...

I guess a blog really helps you in self-realization.. you type out your thoughts, what directly comes into your mind and you put it into words. Sometimes, it's hard to put all your emotions and things you want to say into words. I've tried my best to upload pictures.. but I guess it's just a failure as I'm a bum..

I really hope this site would go on.. and on.. either as a record of my daily life.. or maybe in future.. something that would entertain even more.. Happy belated birthday, "the different side"!

It takes 4 cups of coffee to get thru a working day...

Man.. I seriously can't stand driving in the morning sometimes.. it's really tiring when you have to drive 1 hour plus to work when u had only like 5 hours of sleep.. u feel like you're half dead and u're like a zombie.. Today.. I was really dozing off while driving... I really can't keep my eyes open.. I just felt like sleeping and let my car drive itself.. gosh.. they should have some auto driver shit jus like auto-pilotting on the plane...

I guess the smart tunnel is fucking dumb after all.. it's supposed to be a tunnel where there will be no flash floods on the highway.. but guess wat.. this dumb tunnel has been flooded over and over again.. to the extent they have to close it several times to maintain it.. it's causing traffic congestion to everyone working at KL... Flyfm's ben was damn sarcastic today.. he sorta describe the smart tunnel as a big longkang in KL... a place where all the water will go to! haha.. I guess.. Samy boy is lucky as he is no longer the works minister... but I pity his successor...

The first thing I did when I arrive at my client's place was to go to the nearest coffee shop to have a cup of kopi-0.. I had a cup an hour ago at home.... and guess what.. by 11.00 something... I was zoning off at my client's place.. it's just so damn dry and boring.. it makes me wanna sleep.. I really hate doing uninteresting shit... I wish the whole audit was full of issues.. but yet again.. that would mean my workload would increase by far..

Lunch time.. there goes.. another cup of kopi-0.. barely 15 minutes setting my ass on the chair after lunch.. I dozed off again.. I gave up.. I went down to the sundry shop and got 3 cans of kopi-o.. but I only had one lerr.. It's a total of 4 cups at the end of the day! It's like a routine to me already.. to have 4 cups of coffee (minimum)..... if not I really can't see myself getting thru the day.. I guess the 4-5 hours of sleep everyday has been catching up wif me... I get really grumpy sometimes and I just feel like doing nothing........

Imagine I'm only having a normal work day of 8 hours.. I can't see myself working for more hours than that..I'll probably need 7 cups of coffee at least... and you know what.. each time I dun have coffee.. I'll start to have a runny nose... gosh.. I think it's like drugs to me now.. I'm screwed...! I should start looking for caffeine pills.. faster way of feeling awake!

Guess that's just working life.. a fucking pain in the ass

U know it's gonna be a bad day when...

1. Your favourtie football team got beaten badly last night by their arch rivals...
2. Man Utd seems to be having a clear run at the top of the Premiership....
3. You have a tummy ache from yesterday's rojak...
4. You realize you are not yet a CPA member...
5. You realize you can't register for the mentor programme and risk having to work an extra half
a year at EY...
6. You realize the cut-off for CPA registration is Feb 29th....
7. Your claims for expenses are missing...
8. You just can't seem to get anything done in the morning...
9. Your kopi-O and newspaper you want is sold out at 7-11...
10.You don't get to meet the person you want to meet...
11.You don't get to hear the song you want to on the radio...
12.You can't seem to do anything right at work...
13.You thought you lose your senior's thumbdrive...
14.You're caught in a heavy jam and all you want to do is go home and lie down..
15.You think you have a traffic summon coming your way...
16.Your thoughts are everywhere...

I really want to listen to 'Bad day' by Daniel Powter right now.. !

Some games are just not for people with faint of heart..

Something struck me today.. I shall not play a game which I'm not up for it. It's just like drinking.. u have to know your limits.. and never go beyond it.. if not you'll suffer the consequences of a hangover and vomitting..

Things I don't understand...

I don't understand why.. your manager has to give u work at 5 p.m when u were sitting down doing nothing from 8.30 a.m till 10.00 a.m. It annoys the shit out of me when ur mgr/senior or ur fellow colleague gives u work at 5 p.m. It's like.. wtf.. I've been sitting down doing nothing for half the day.. now u give me shit to work on at 5 p.m just went I'm about to leave.. I really don't get it.. why not they just give you a schedule and let u know what u have to work on for the day, so that people who come early can start work early and go home early.. those fuckers who come late can stay till late.. it's all about being efficient and flexible with schedule and time planning...

Another thing is when you have to clean up other's mess.. I was given a set of audit working papers.. and I was ordered to fill in a form which shows what work has been done on it.. gosh.. I looked at it.. and I started swearing in office.. wtf...? how can u tell what that person has done..? I swear.. it is impossible to know what work has been done in a particular area you did it by urself.. I've been cleaning up other ppl's shit for this past one month.. some shit that I don't even understand.. I just simply do some shit.. and make it a bigger pile of shit.. sometimes, I really doubt the effectiveness of an audit...

Thirdly, Malaysians have spoken and know that they want a change.. but have those who always asked for a change really know what they want..? Do you want equality, less corruption... or u just don't give a damn... whatever change is good..? Things going on in the transition period for the state governments aren't going smoothly.. well, for me, it doesn't matter who becomes the Menteri Besar as long as I get to eat my bak kut teh.. and I get to eat my roast pork.. Well, I doubt that there will be bak kut teh in Kedah and Perak, haha.. I think the whole problem lies in the state and federal constitution.. everything is set based on the importance of one race..

Before the elections my dad asked me, do you think there'll be a difference..? I said yeah.. but now.. I'm starting to feel that I might have to eat my words.. He gave me the analogy of a major shareholder vs the minority.. seriously.. who gives a fuck bout the minority shareholder..? If you don't like the company policy, sell your shares and fuck off.. who cares bout the interest of a minority shareholder? It's the major shareholder that counts as he has the most stakes.. well.. take that analogy and apply it to the current situation in Malaysia...

The thing is.. the minorities are so used to being surpressed that they can't speak up for equality anymore... they want a change... but I guess.. it is almost impossible to get equality here..

Proudest moment as a Malaysian for everyone..

Finally.. Malaysians has spoken up.. after 50 years of supression and marginalisation by the coalition government.. we Malaysians finally fought back and speak up what's on our minds.. We let them know that we are no longer conservative people who are afraid to let things change.. we are all educated people and we are always willing to change things when things are not going on the right track for the country..

Forget bout those olden era where the whole lot of voters are usually staunch supporters of one party and would always forgive the party whenever they screw up... People of the new era are less forgiving and we are exposed to what's happening outside Malaysia. Voters can always use the internet the most advanced media to reach information sources that we could never access before this to give us clarification on what really is going on in the government and the dirty tricks, corruption and manipulation carried out by certain individuals or parties... Gone are those days..

Today.. Malaysians finally make full use of their democracy rights.. they finally realize the need to be recognised as a Malaysian and not according to our racial roots... I agree.. the whole problem of racial equality has not been solved and it would be difficult to do so.. but at least.. we are on the right track... regardless of which party contests on the next election.. they know that the people do not buy their racial strategies anymore.. we don't buy their ideology of only helping a certain race.. what we want is an equal opportunity for all of us.. to bring this nation to a whole new level and to have everyone in this country to be united as one..

Besides that, the upset caused by the opposition was not a tsunami.. neither it was something that should catch us by surprise.. all the signs have shown towards an upset.. all the signs were pointing towards a change.. and finally.. people exercise their rights for a change.. this is not only a success for the opposition party.. but a success for us as Malaysians.. we finally get a more balanced government, a government with more people's voice.. I believe everyone should be given a fair chance to speak up their mind.. given a fair chance to give constructive comments and everyone should be given a share of the country's development..

Before 8th of March, I knew there were doubters, doubters that doubt that there will be a change, I myself was quite skeptical too.. I thought that things will always stay the same and never change.. but I guess I was wrong.. Malaysians have improved and I'm proud of it.. This is one of the proudest moment of my life as a Malaysian.. I guess my decision to come back has not totally been wrong.. it's starting to show good signs.. it's starting to show that Malaysians to have a democratic system despite manipulation by certain parties and individuals.. We managed to sweep out ministers who don't perform.. our birthday boy today.. finally realized.. he's not unbeatable after all... he's not God.. he is only human.. and he has to face the consequences of his failure of fighting for the rights of his community and only fighting for his individual benefit...

I guess.. this is a really good beginning.. a new era.. new hope for us as Malaysians..

Every man's nightmare... HAIR LOSS!!!

As usual I went for my monthly haircut today.. and all I thought of was to jus haf a haircut ler... Well.. the hairdresser did her usual thing and all.. but as she went on.. she told me that I my scalp was sensitive and..... I was suffering from HAIR LOSS.. wtf.. I mean.. I know I don't have much hair.. and some more she tell me hair loss in the middle part..... u say... HAI LATZZZ or not..? aihhhsss.. i got my pay check yesterday.. gave nearly half of it to my mom.. another RM140 burnt off for hair products today.. wtf man.. wat am I gonna eat for the rest of the month...? Sigh.....

Anyways.. things has been going on smoothly this few weeks.. too smooth to the extent I'm actually afraid of whether I'll be able to adapt to a tensed working environment! Well.. I'm not complaining ler.. it's borin shit and all.. but I kinda adapted to it already.. Btw.. today I only worked for 3 hours.. syok rite..? another 5-6 hours was spent on doing rubbish....!

On another note.. election is coming and the election fever really is ons here.. unlike the elections in Australia.. the election here involves a lot of flyers and posters everywhere.. come to think of it.. we're not really helping the environment.. all these bloody politicians.. during normal days never see them.. during elections.. can see them at every corner of Malaysia.. messed up man.. I really hope those who can vote already to vote wisely.. our country is not as well as it seems..... 7.3 % of GDP growh.. who the fuck came out with these figures man..? I guess they just shit out the figures to deceive some dumb ppl.. ppl fail to realize that prices of essential items have gone way high but our pay hasn't gone up at all...

Another cancer patient that I know of.. has lost the battle.. seriously, sometimes life is just unfair.. her daughter in law is about to deliver in april.. one more month to go.. and she had to go.. life is just fated sometimes..

That's all for now.. hope everyone's doing well......!

Boring weekend...

Looks like.. my life pretty much revolves around these few things... work, sleep, eat, mahjong and mamak.. This weekend.. mahjong was taken off from my list of things to do.. so.. I'm left with work, sleep and eat... freaking sien man.. Well, maybe its time to get some rest also ler.. I've been sleeping for 6 hours or 5 hours plus for the past one month or so... I hardly get 8 hour sleeps anymore.. I can't imagine ppl like Damien, Sheanee or Joanna working next time.. They'll probably sleep in the office or something like that...

Someone told me the other day.. u dun look like u're from klang.. U dun haf the klang 'look'.. In my heart I was like wtf... wat u expect me to haf..? Red, yellow and green hair.. scream into your ears while talking to u... and pushing u around while talking to u and so on..? Gosh.. I think klangnites are misunderstood sometimes.. Just because there are gangsters in klang and a lot of ah bengs in Klang doesn't mean everyone's like that.. I think Klang ppl are actually nice ppl and fucking hell.. at least we get our fireworks.. unlike losers in the city and near the city who don't haf such luxury.. Yeah.. we might not be as cool as others.. but we're down to earth ppl..... ok ok.... enuf said..! I don't wanna offend too many ppl..

I haf had to haf lunch alone a couple of times last week.. see.. being able to haf lunch alone is not too bad after all.. It gets a bit boring.. thts when ur ipod comes in handy.. or maybe ur mobile phone.. I get so bored at work sometimes.. that I need to go thru my list of contacts.. n to msg ppl that I think will entertain me.. Haha.. explains how boring my job is... it's freaking tedious! A couple of my friends had to work late the last week.. one till 7 in the morning.. wth.. no need sleep meh..? like that torture ppl......

Well... I'm so not looking forward to tomorrow and the week ahead.. I need some excitement in my life man.. If I continue leaving such a life.. sooner or later.. I'll be a dull old fart...

Finally... the real shit...

Well.. looks like the next two weeks is gonna be hell for me... I have to compile 3 audit working papers for 3 subsidiaries.. of some stupid company which means.. I have 3 working days for each working paper.. imagine.. a newbie like me who has no idea wat some of the basic jargons and who has forgotten wat I learnt in university given such a big task.. I really can't imagine... if I can't pull this off.. I really duno wat to do.. it's not like university, where if u can't hand in ur assignment u just get marks deducted... so to those of u still at uni.. damn it.. stick to ur dateline...

I come to work everyday.. asking myself whether this job is suitable for me or not.. it really is some boring shit.. and at the moment I can't see myself staying for 3 years.. I don't understand what I'm doing.. everyone is moving like a F1 car.. it could be hard to catch someone to ask them.. how to do things.. everyone here somehow looks a bit robotic to me and all they do is work.. it scares u sometimes when u see the amount of ppl back at the office even at 11 p.m. Gosh.. at moments like this.. I wished I was at uni where I have my fellow classmates stressing out with me and doing the same shit with me.. and we could still collaborate.. over here.. u do ur own shit... others do theirs...

I just can't find the passion to work.. I can't find something that I like.. it's really difficult for me.. it's like a Man Utd fan being forced to play for Liverpool or Arsenal.. u just can't be bothered and u're just willing to sit there without ever playing..

Seriously...... what should I do.......?

Anyways.. to all of u melbournians having exams.. all the best..!

Valentine's Day....

Well, it looks like tomorrow is Valentine's day, YET again... the day to look forward to for couples (actually for guys.. maybe it's not such a good thing, but hey, u dunno wats in store for you at the end of the day *wink*, haha). For those who are still single (like me), it's a day to avoid shopping centers,cinemas and love spots... or rather.. making love spots.. HAHA

Anyways, this year's Valentine's would be different... not that I've found a date.. ok.. maybe I've found a date.. with my JOB... rather than previous years where my single friends would play mahjong.. and sigh throughout the game.. or looking through our phonebook.. wondering which girl would be available for a date.. or even daydreaming that one day we'll find the ONE...

Oh well... maybe it's not too bad after all.. I still get to keep my own cash and splurge on things that I like.. rather than burning a hole in my pocket getting flowers and gifts that are overpriced around this time of the year (a way to comfort myself, give me some pride please....) So, it's actually not too bad in a way....

Yeap.. to those of you celebrating this day.. treasure ur loved ones.. and appreciate them.. hope you guys would start a new 'life' in 9 months time (hint: CC)... hehe.. jk...

Post from office (Gong Xi Fa Cai)

Well, it's been about 2 weeks that I've started working... Well, what can I say (sounds like Shebby Singh)? Earning money is harder than spending money, duh.. so those ppl back in melbourne who are still spending their parents' money, continue doing so till a stage that you are fully satisfied.. then only start working...

I reached office at 7.30 a.m this morning just to beat the jam.. and so that I can blog for all of u... hehe.. see.. I so nice right? Anyways... orientation is going on for this two days.. gosh.. after this would be hell for me.. I'm gonna start work again on wednesday... and this time is the real assignment.. not like the last one.. where I just help out my fellow colleague!

Well.. after my lessons from my first week of work, I no longer wear G2000 when I go back to main office.. I wear something that is not that common, for example.. the Ben Shermen shirt that I got from Melboune.. On another note... I've been eating like... 5 - 6 meals a day during CNY.. so it's back to dieting YET again (that's what I say all the time)..

Btw.. I would like to wish everyone a happy chinese new year, hope you guys are making loads of money and sharing them with me.. to you melbournians.. happy seeing each other everyday till march! Hehe..